5/18/2007

A New Service...

In my never-ending quest to be as much like George W. Bush as I can, I am offering a new service to all my blog visitors. Dubya is known to have a penchant for nicknaming people. Since none of you will ever get within two feet of him, I'm prepared to fill the void. Just leave a request in the comments and I'll give you your own nickname. Some of you may already have a nickname or two, but that doesn't matter. Before you do, though, three things:
  • The nickname I give you may or may not have anything to do with you, your personality, or your appearance.
  • If the nickname I give you sounds like it may be offensive, I assure you, no offense will have been intended.
  • I will try to respond promptly. I know there will be a lot of people clamoring for their new monikers, so just be patient and I'll get to you each in due time.
O.K. Step right up. Who's first?

53 comments:

Frank Sirmarco said...

Although I already have too many nicknames to mention, sock it to me, baby!

Jen said...

I'm in...

Johnny Yen said...

I'd like a nickname for my nickname

Chris said...

Frank= "Guacamole-Pants"

Jen= "The Guillotine"

Chris said...

Johnny= "Squidbait"

The [Cherry] Ride said...

Hit me, bitch!

Chris said...

Cherry= "Snugglebucket"

teri said...

oh, this is fun. what's mine?

Big Orange said...

do I dare ask??

Doc said...

I think I would like to have something Elizabethan sounding.

Like "churlish beef-witted coxcomb", or what ever you have handy.

Hell, I'll answer to most anything.

Doc

Chris said...

Teri= "Peach Pit"

B.O.= "Uncle Moonpie"

Doc- You'll get what I give you! You're now "Puddles" (By the way, hope you're feeling better!)

Johnny Yen said...

I like it! You da man, Chris!

slinger said...

give it a spin, dude

Doc said...

Nickname me!

Spooney said...

SPOONEY WANT NICK NAME!

lulu said...

me me me!

Chris said...

Slinger= "Captain Calamity"

Doc- I already did, Puddles!

Spooney= "Gristle-tits"

Skylers Dad said...

I would love one, but it has to be single syllable, cause I ain't had too much book learnin...

Chris said...

Lulu- "Bacon Breath"

Chris said...

S.D.= "Loog"

Flannery Alden said...

Sorry, that second request was from me, not Doc...

Chris said...

Flann= "The Polynesian Puma"

RandyLuvsPaiste said...

Me, me, me!

RandyLuvsPaiste said...

This might be your best post ever!

Dick Small said...

Well it couldn't be any more offensive than the name I already have....

Dick Small said...

... so okay, go ahead.

Big Orange said...

"UNCLE MOONPIE"!!! BWA HA HA HA!! I might have to change my avitar o'er at Frying Bacon...

Elizabeth said...

Should I be scared?

Okay, go for it.

Big Orange said...

I tried to photoshop a whole bunch of moon pies over the naked butts of some cute ladies (GET IT?! MOON PIE?!?) but I lost interest halfway through-- it wasn't as funny as I imagined it would be.

i'm usin' the name, though...

mixednut said...

Do your worst.

Phil said...

Lay it on me.

Tenacious S said...

Hope I'm not too late for a name.

Amy said...

I can't wait to hear mine.

Anon. Blogger said...

Please, please, tell me it isn't too late for a name! I mean, of all bloggers, I could use a name, right?

Chris said...

Randy= "Johnny Applesauce"

Dick= "Q-Bert"

Elizabeth= "Miss Mystery"

Mixed Nut= "Ukulele-head"

Phil= "Mittens"

TenS= "Spunkles"

Chris said...

Amy= "Sally Shoehorn"

Anon= "Bubbles"

Al Sensu said...

Sock it to me.

Chris said...

Al= "Poonut"

cheer34 said...

please rename me sir.

Chris said...

Cheer34= "Squirmburger"

Elizabeth said...

Ah, Miss Mystery. I like it!

Phil said...

Better watch it! Or I'll get my 'Mittens' on ya!

CATHERINETTE SINGLETON said...

Me!! I want one too!!

The Boob Lady said...

Sock it to me, Chris. I'd love to hear what you come up with.

Bubbles said...

I'm liking it!

Al Sensu said...

That is so perfect! I am one, thank you!

Valerie said...

Add me to the list, please.

10,000 Spoons said...

47 comments? Shit, *I* need to do something like this.

Chris said...

Catherinette= "The Arctic Firefly"

Boob Lady= "Hootie-pie"

Val= "Mama Mayhem"

'Bubbles' said...

I forgot to answer the question. Frank. Frank was first.

Bubs said...

Go ahead and hit me with a nickname tough guy.

Coaster Punchman said...

Me too.

Chris said...

Bubs= "Roadkill"

C.P.= "Yogi"