6/02/2008

I'm A Farmer...

Ever since Megan moved in, she has talked about how she wants to grow vegetables in our yard. She has read books about what will grow best here, when to plant what, and has made lists of things she'll need. Yesterday we went and picked up various types of dirt. We dug a little 4' x 4' section of the yard (pictured above) with plenty of sunlight so that she'll be ready to plant stuff.

As many of you know, I'm not a big vegetable fan. I wish I was. I asked her what she was planning on growing.

Megan: Well, there'll be tomatoes, squash, peas, onions, garlic, various herbs, etc.

Me: (Sarcastically) Ooo, all my favorites!

Megan: Oh yeah? Well, what do you want me to grow?

Me: I don't know. How about frozen pizza? Hamburgers? Ice Cream Sandwiches?

Megan: Sigh.

You see, what makes this exchange humorous is that neither frozen pizza, hamburgers, nor ice cream sandwiches can be planted and grown. It's just not possible. It is ridiculous to even suggest such a thing. There's no such thing as a frozen pizza seed or a hamburger tree. And how the hell would someone grow ice cream sandwiches? They need to be kept in a freezer or else they melt all over the place! It's just not feasible. That's why it's so funny.

15 comments:

SkylersDad said...

I am feeling a little bit foolish right now, and will be going out to my garden to dig up the ice cream sandwich parts I put in last fall...

Falwless said...

I don't really understand. Is this funny?

Teri said...

Is that why the cheese burger I planted last summer didn't sprout?

damn it!

Anonymous said...

This is why it's so irritating to me when people protest genetically modified food. It's like they don't understand how awesome a bratwurst tree could be.

Amy said...

FUCK! I just bought some pizza seeds and snake oil from some really convincing dude on a wagon.

I'm so gullible.

That post made me laugh pretty hard, and your garden is lovely and flourishing already! WOW!

Mnmom said...

Glad you explained that cuz I was all excited about a gyro bush.

Micgar said...

Oh really-I've grown ice cream sandwiches! And they are soooo delicious when they're fresh-not from the store!
Nice looking garden!

Joe said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Joe said...

No need to explain here. I've totally stolen your "real queso cheese" joke and use it often.

Is Meg doing square foot gardening?

Some Guy said...

S.D.- Don't feel foolish. It's a common mistake.

Falwless- Not really.

Teri- Frustrating, isn't it?

Clare- You know where they have bratwurst trees? Heaven.

Amy- It could happen to anyone.

MNMom- Gyros sounds like a good idea for lunch today.

Micgar- Do you grow them organically?

Bubs- As a matter of fact, she is doing square foot gardening. It's her first one, so we'll see how it goes.

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Dude, listen to her and eat what she plants. You'll live longer on her diet than yours, I guarantee it.

GETkristiLOVE said...

What is so funny is that Megan puts up with it.

Bob said...

I've never seen a square foot, and I'm pretty sure you can't grow feet in a garden. Even if you could, where the hell do you buy square shoes?

Micgar said...

Well I have used so pesticides so no...I think that's the end of that joke, huh?

bubbles said...

How about a compromise. Have her grow eggplant.

Any you better get out and dig some more cause 4x4 doesn't sound big enough.