Small Towns...

Moving from a large metropolitan area to a rural one, I have come to appreciate the way small town folks create their own fun. We don't have the museums, live music venues, malls, or electricity that you city slickers take for granted. People get together and organize goofy events that are big on kitsch, but that can also be a lot of fun. For example, there is a town up here called Horton Bay. It's not much of a town. There's a general store and, well, that's it. I'd be surprised if more than 200 people live there. However, each 4th of July, they have a parade that attracts tens of thousands of people. There are no high school bands, no cub scout troops, no fire engines, and sadly, no Shriner's with their little go-karts. There is always a theme and small groups of people get together, develop an entry, make costumes, and have a blast with it.

Another example was "Poochfest", which Megan and I attended yesterday. It was basically an excuse for everyone to bring their dogs to the park. There were dog obstacle course competitions (pictured above), games for dogs, and contests which included:
  • Best tail-wagger
  • Smallest dog
  • Biggest dog
  • Most obedient dog
  • Least obedient dog (talk about a clusterfuck!)
  • Dog who looks the most like their owner
  • etc.
I think there are areas they could improve on this event. For one, they need some fresher contests. Those are WAY too predictable. Here are a few suggestions I have:
  • Dog that smells the most like their owner
  • Dog with the biggest turds
  • Best leg-humper
  • Dog that can empty the water from a toilet bowl the fastest
  • Best crotch-hound (this one's for you Carlin fans)
  • Ugliest owner
I was going to add one that involved peanut butter, but seeing as this is a family blog, I'll refrain.


SkylersDad said...

Best stupid dog or stupid munan trick, a la Letterman?

Megan said...

Dogs really like peanut butter.

Joe said...

You could do an award for most enthusiastic self-licking, I have a dog who'd show well in that group.

Writeprocrastinator said...

"Best leg-humper."

This is the best blog post of the week, it won't even be close.

bubbles said...

Dog with the worst breath would be a good one. You can judge that one, tho.