6/06/2007

Republican Debate Scorecard...

You know, it takes a lot of intestinal fortitude to make it through a republican debate, but I do it so you don't have to. Here is an abbreviated summary of each candidate's performance (L to R).
  • Tom Tancredo - Sucky.
  • Tommy Thompson - Seemed drunk.
  • Sam Brownback - Lame.
  • Mitt Romney - An empty vessel.
  • Rudy Giuliani - Was he in New York on 9-11? I wish he'd tell us.
  • John McCain - Stop calling me "your friend", schmuck.
  • Mike Huckleberry - Scary religious dude.
  • Duncan Hunter - Meh.
  • Jim Gilmore - Double meh.
  • Ron Paul - Right on Iraq, but wrong on a bunch of other shit.
Winner: The lightning strikes that kept fucking up the sound equipment.
Loser: All of us.

6 comments:

Flannery Alden said...

You have provided me with a valuable service.

And thanks for the picture, too. That is the whitest bunch of white that ever whited.

Slinger said...

Is it just me, or does it seem like the Republican party has already given up? The highlights I saw, BOOORRRRing!

I believe America will elect a Democrat, and they are fed up with what GW has done.

Skylers Dad said...

But what about the comb-over report? I need to know their status.

vikkitikkitavi said...

Thanks, Chris, for the "do not worship Ron Paul" reminder. As I've said before, he may speak sanity on Iraq, but he brings plenty-o-crazy to a variety of other topics.

Big Orange (a.k.a. "Uncle Moonpie") said...

what's all that shit hanging in the background? Why are all their suits exactly the same??

10,000 Spoons said...

poopheads. I'm surprised a rent didn't open up in the universe and suck them all into oblivion.

HA! MORE proof that God either doesn't exist!! He missed a perfect opportunity!