My business is weird. Unlike most people, I don't get a regular paycheck every other week or twice a month. I used to when I worked for firms. Now that I work for myself, I get paid in lump sums every so often. Today happens to be one of those days. I need ideas for what to blow my wad on. Here's my list so far:
- a birdfeeder
- crack
- bird seed
- Liquid-Plumr
Anyone have any suggestions?
22 comments:
I vote for Crack.
or catnip for The Assman.
crack
OR something less harmful like weed
Um, guys, crack is already on the list. I'm looking for other suggestions.
Birdy crack (you have to ask specifically, it's not on the shelves) then Assman can go out and take 'em down!
I'm totally not the boss of you. Get whatever you want.
Handgun.
Internet Porn.
Isn't most internet porn free?
I vote for a lady friend for Assman. Or a boyfriend, I don't know what Assman prefers.
When you asked for suggestions as to what to blow your wad on, I thought this thread was going in an entirely different direction.
How about a plumber's crack. Oh, wait-- that's free.
Is the bird feeder a regular bird feeder, or a hummingbird feeder? Because if it's a regular bird feeder, you could also get a hummingbird feeder, if you want.
And vicey versey.
PCP. I don't know what's better, that or Special K. Any illegal street drug will do I suppose.
How about something shiny for Megan? We like stuff.
( I like Geo's answer...)
bagels
Stock up on your favorite beverage, say beer for example. I believe in saving for a rainy day. I'm very responsible that way.
bacon, frozen pizzas, elk jerky, you know, staples.
I would've seconded Grant Miller's suggestion, but everyone knows the best internet porn is free...and I'm always in favor of buying more guns, but that's been suggested too.
So I'll go with lottery tickets. Yes indeed.
Hummel figures and a wrist rocket (it's a slingshot with surgical tubing).
How about a gold tooth?
A new Apple Macintosh.
I can be bought. Or just get the chocolate bar.
freaky sex
Tofifay.
That candy rocks my world.
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