9/28/2007

A Bloody Weekend Ahead...


The last weekend of September each year is the weekend all the area ski patrols gather to be re-certified for the upcoming ski season. Saturday we spend the whole day being refreshed on fracture management, backboarding, treating open, bloody wounds, and identifying potential medical issues. I'm especially looking forward to a segment on pneumothoraxes and pericardial tamponade. Often, they try to make the scenarios as lifelike as possible using fake, squirting blood and phony impaled objects. We break half-way for a lovely chicken lunch and finish the day off with a bunch of beers.

Sunday we update our CPR certification and do a chairlift evacuation. This involves shooting a line up over the lift cable and using a simple belay system with a seat to lower the skiers down. It's usually a fun day if the weather is nice and the fall colors are getting close to their peak.

This is usually around the time I start letting my beard grow out for the winter. Megan is thrilled. Seriously. She actually likes the beard. Go figure.

12 comments:

kirby said...

Uhm, should I even ask what tamponade means?

Sushiboy said...

How long you been doing SP? Beards are better than scarfs for keeping out the cold IMHO.

The Lady Who Doesn't Lunch: said...

I'm probably going to the mall to return some pants but wanted you to know that I'm very glad there are people like you to save my sorry ass when I've acted like an idiot while skiing.

Bubs said...

You are on the ski patrol?! Dude, that is as cool as being a smoke jumper or a fighter pilot. Wow.

By the way, isn't the moulage cool on those fake injury exercises?

'Bubbles' said...

Beards are good. Megan is right.

I got to ride down the mountain with the ski patrol once. I sliced my wrist open somehow. It was gross.

Splotchy said...

You had me at fake squirting blood and a lovely chicken lunch.

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

There are so many beard jokes I could do right now but the one I want to do might piss you off so I won't do it. If any of my Michigan relatives who are still speaking to me go skiing up your way, I'll tell them to have an accident near you.

cooper green said...

I am terribly concerned. Where there was once a photo of some living person on a ski lift before, there is now a red "X". You're in the hospital, aren't you? If you ski like you dive, you have broken an important thing. Please give us a complete medical report, but resist the urge to post photos.

Skylers Dad said...

Nothing says good ski day like an impalement!

From all of us skiers out here, thanks Chris!

Chris said...

Kirby- It's like lemonade, only...

SB- Last year was my tenth season. I especially like it when icicles form on the beard on a snowy day. It looks cool.

TLWDL- I'm glad to help.

Bubs- I was a victim during a test who was suffering from third degree facial burns. It was scary-looking.

Bubbles- I had a guy slice his wrist last season. It freaked me out because of the amount of blood. He was OK luckily.

Splotchy- They make for a nice combo.

Dr.- Please don't. The less injuries I have to deal with, the better.

Coop- I'm not sure what happened. It's been happening a lot lately.

S.D.- You're welcome!

Laaw-yuhr said...

Re Megan liking the beard -- that's how you known you've found a good one.

Writeprocrastinator said...

"This is usually around the time I start letting my beard grow out for the winter. Megan is thrilled. Seriously. She actually likes the beard. Go figure."

Okay, let's review. Loves, German food, beer and the beard? Don't be an idiot, man! Take her to Vegas and get married!