An Idea...

Pictured: Generic Corporate Douchebag

OK, we all know that CEOs and other upper management-types make WAY too much fucking money these days. However, there are no signs that any of these people are prepared to sacrifice any of their pay to make things more equitable any time soon. So how about this for a baby step in the right direction:
  • Take the total payroll for one year of any given entity with more than one employee (corporation, small business, etc.) .
  • Divide it by 52 (weeks).
  • Divide this number by the total number of employees.
  • Pay each employee this amount for one week out of the year and call it "Worker Appreciation Week" or some shit.
So, for one week out of the year, the guy at the bottom and the guy at the top make exactly the same amount. I mean, fuck. It's just one week! I think a CEO could stomach that. Then, the disparate wages go right back to where they were the following week. Just think about how good it'd feel for that one week. The people at the top might learn some empathy. The people in the middle might see a little bump in pay. The people at the bottom might have enough to pay off their credit cards and even afford a little vacation.

There's probably a million glitches with this idea, but cut me some slack. I only had about five minutes to work on it.


Splotchy said...

You've got a deal, if during that week you also give me the keys to the executive washroom so's I can stink it up real good and proper.

Writeprocrastinator said...

Not a bad concept, for just a five minute mulling over.

Frank Sirmarco said...

Your communist seeds will not find purchase here, pinko!

Anonymous said...

J says: I concur with Frunkis. This plan is a BAD idea. Please keep these ideas away from the little people.

Some Guy said...

Dear Frank and J- Keep your capitalist piggery off of my blog! Go on, scoot!

SkylersDad said...

Reminds me of an old proverb:

When shit becomes of value, the poor will be born without assholes.

Pretty deep, huh?

anne altman said...

sign me up now. work out the kinks later.

someone at the bottom

Falwless said...

Easy for you to say.

Lots Better Then Your Blog, Inc.

Dave said...

Go back to Russia!

Anonymous said...

J says: I'm going to buy your little blog and hand the keys over to BillO

BeckEye said...

Yeah, but for that week, the "guy at the top" will still leave his dirty coffee mugs all over the office, and the "guy at the bottom" will still have to clean up after his grown, lazy ass.