11/09/2008

Ways I Annoy The Shit Out Of My Girlfriend, Part 79...

This is a series I started a while ago. Let me start by saying that I work damn hard for this blog. I spent the better part of the day coming up with this one. I even skipped working at the local soup kitchen like I usually do on Sunday. This post required a lot of trial and error. I had to run a number of diagnostic tests to determine what Megan finds the most annoying. After each, I'd ask, "So, on a scale of one to a hundred and twelve, how annoying was that?" Then I'd record the results on a clipboard. Well, not actually on the clipboard itself, but on a piece of paper attached to the clipboard. Anyway, the winner, at least for today, was a particularly obnoxious way of consuming Doritos. You may want to turn up the volume to get the full effect of the crunching. Enjoy.

33 comments:

Dr Zibbs said...

I love these. They could be a blog all by themselves. My favorite is the goofy walk.

Poobomber said...

Did I just spend one minute and 29 seconds of my life watching you eat Doritos and drink beer?

Yes, yes I think I just did.

You know, I didn't find anything annoying about it at all. It was funny to watch your ears move quite a bit with each bite though. Is that something I should be commenting on?

katrocket said...

I found it "kind of" annoying - I mean, I was too distracted from laughing at myself for watching you eat Doritos for a minute and a half. Verdict: your girlfriend is a SAINTE.

Bubs said...

I dunno. That really wasn't that annoying.

Micgar said...

Oh man! That is irritating! I always think that crunching is irritating but I forget that I would do it too when eating crunchy foods! I also hate lip smack eating too.

Megan said...

Bubs - Might it be a bit annoying if you were trying to work on your OWN blog post and Sir Chomps-a-lot was standing in your doorway crunching away and gleefully gauging your level of irriation? I think maybe.

Megan said...

See, it's so irritating I spelled "irritation" wrong.

kirby said...

The only thing that would make that more annoying would be for you to spend a good minute or so making that noise people make when they try to suck little chunks of food out of their teeth.

Gwen said...

Dammit! I think I used up all of my allotted video watching time writing a post of my own as my computer has stopped letting me play videos. I'll be back when I'm out of time out.

Suze said...

Ugh, that is a pet peeve of mine - listening to people eat chips. AARGH!!! Your girlfriend deserves a medal or at the very least, a new pair of shoes!

Mnmom said...

Well that was 1:29 I'll never get back, but somehow I think I'm the better for it.

I agree with Kirby - you completely forgot the teeth sucking!

I guess my siblings and I all chew really loud - my kids and their cousins call it "Jenkins Jaws".

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

I couldn't watch, it was too annoying.

Flannery Alden said...

Compelling video, Chris. I particularly liked the dedication to getting the whole stack in your mouth before crunching. Very high society.

...The only thing that would have made it better would have been if you were sitting on your green plaid couch.

Doc said...

I could sit and watch you masticate all day. What kind of beer did you have? What beer goes best with a dorrito binge?

Doc

Some Guy said...

Doc- It was a Molson Canadian. It's pretty much what I drink all the time unless Megan buys something fancy. It goes well with most things.

SkylersDad said...

9.5 for me, you missed a perfect 10 by failing to wipe your Cheetos fingers on the couch.

McGone said...

Actually, you seem to burn extra calories by working the face in an exaggerated manner like that. Annoying or Genius? It's a fine line.

~E said...

Let me get this straight. You are on part SEVENTY-NINE of a series of how you ANNOY your GIRLFRIEND?!?!

Somebody get that girl a medal! Or a very large piece of chocolate!

On second thought, give her the medal and Ill take the chocolate. Im hungry after watching you chow down.

President Roslin said...

I am laughing at myself for watching that.

Gwen said...

How did you do that without cracking up? I'd have gotten to 0:05 and spewed half-chewed Doritos all over my camera. Thanks for the belly laugh.

BeckEye said...

Goldang it, you're sexy!

raf said...

Who's your girfriend?Mother Teresa of Calcutta?
And wich flavor are the red doritos?Here in Spain are usually bright orange!?

Cheer34 said...

I hate that crunching...G man does it too.....it drives me crazy especially during PMS week.....he slurps too just to annoy me when he has nothing else to bother me with....uggghhhh! I hate that

Falwless said...

Gahtdammit. I'm at work. Unviewable. I'm dying over here. I love your "annoying" videos! Hmph.

Philly said...

Wow , your ears have a life of their own while you are chewing,,,LOL

#1

pistols at dawn said...

This is good stuff, and not only because I love Doritos and all things Doritos-related.

vikkitikkitavi said...

I find the mere existence of Doritos annoying.

Cora said...

Okay, I'll bite: so what does Megan do to annoy YOU?

Tenacious S said...

Crunching=irritating
Dorito breath=deadly

Some Guy said...

Cora- Nothing. She's perfect in every way. Plus, she reads all these comments, which I guess is pretty annoying.

Falwless said...

This was well worth the wait.

Cora said...

:-)

GETkristiLOVE said...

I'm usually with Megan on these videos, but after watching that, I was more thirsty for beer than anything. Did you say there was Doritos in there too? Huh... must have missed that part.