7/29/2008

I Shall Cherish This Always...

My first birthday card came today! I'm so excited! It's from my insurance agent. I wonder how he knew I was such a big fan of Dalmations! And red pick-up trucks! And distant rolling hills! It shall be displayed with prominence on my refrigerator. Come to think of it, fuck that! This baby needs to be framed!

The front of the card (which is actually a postcard) reads "Wherever the next year takes you..." and the back reads, "Enjoy the ride." Wow. Poignant. Then, in computer-generated faux-handwriting it reads "Have a great birthday!" and is auto-signed by my agent's printer.

I may not have much time for blogging during the next few days. Most of my time will be spent holding back tears of joy and gratitude as I compose a perfectly-worded, heartfelt thank-you note to my agent for his lovely card.

14 comments:

Geo said...

If he had only sent you chocolate covered bacon...

Keeper Of All Things said...

Nothing say "love" like dogs and pick-up trucks!!!
Your real name is Billy? and you live in the hills right?

Dale said...

I love the fake cards and always display the Christmas ones right alongside the ones I send myself!

Happy Heartfelt Birthday!

Falwless said...

Yeah but did he draw you a picture of a creme-filled penis cake?

Flannery Alden said...

Do I detect sarcasm in this post?

Flannery Alden said...

Oh, and Happy Birthday: You can lead a horse to water, but that doesn't make him a duck.

familytreejunkie said...

you're such a smart ass!

Happy pre birthday. I have you on my facebook so I know that your birthday is:

August 2

Dr Zibbs said...

I like to save those cards and modify them for relatives I don't care too much for. Like for this one, I would write: "Aunt Ellen, Your future might look spotty because Uncle Ted just died - but cheer up and try to get truckin'". The cost savings really add up over the year.

Mnmom said...

Insurance guys - always the first with the Christmas cards. But hey, their calendars come in handy!

Madam Z said...

I'm so happy for you!

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

I guess my card got lost in the mail.

Cormac Brown said...

Happy Spotted Birthday!

Emmanuel Lavoie said...

LOL! Chris, I love this post. you cracked me up with cereals in my mouth!

PPLIC said...

Insurance... Yeah right..