The folks at Pella Windows are really pulling out all the stops to try and solicit my business. They sent me this handsome set of authentic naugahyde coasters -- impeccably hand-stitched by a nine-year-old Malaysian boy -- with the company name proudly emblazoned on top. The set of four came complete with a handy coaster caddy that will demonstrate to my dinner guests that I am a man of style and distinction. Plus, they're low-maintenance and can be easily cleaned with Muriatic Acid and some tack cloth.
OK, all you Andersen Window people. The ball's in your court. You want my business? Whaddya got for me? And it better not be another rhinestone-encrusted tape measure. I've got four already.