12/13/2007

Signs And Symptoms...

My back is killing me today.
Here is a quick description of my symptomology.
If any of you have experienced this, please advise on
the type of treatment that has worked for you.

First, there is a pulsating orange glow just above my asscrack.


For some reason, people keep shooting arrows
and bullets between my shoulder blades.
A few people have thrown darts.


I've been struck by lightning about eight times in the small of my back.


There does appear to be some skin discoloration as well.


Is there a cure or is it time to go shopping for a wheelchair?

8 comments:

vikkitikkitavi said...

Maybe you were struck by lightning, Chris, because you were wearing women's lycra work-out clothing.

SkylersDad said...

The only known remedy is amputation at the neck.

Bubs said...

All I can say is, make sure you order the deluxe model when you get your Rascal scooter, the one with the cup holder and the ashtray.

Madam Z said...

The best treatment for MY aching back is a slow, deep massage, with warm, scented oil, administered by a handsome, muscular man (the guy in your "bullseye" photo would do nicely). Of course, you may prefer the guy in the lycra work-out clothing...

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Get a Hoveround. Or a Rascal!

Grant Miller said...

I often suffer from the symptoms in the first picture.

Micgar said...

Grant that may be constipation from eating too much pumpkin pie?

'Bubbles' said...

Gosh, I hope you are feeling better.