11/09/2007

A Post Drenched In Sarcasm...

I fucking love horse race politics - the type that pervade television news these days. I love the reliance on polls and focus groups. It is critical for me to know who's in front and by what margin. I love listening to pundit prognosticators who make meaningless predictions, day after day. They talk about how if Candidate A wins in Iowa and Candidate B wins in New Hampshire, then Candidate C has no chance, but if Candidate A wins both, then there's still hope for Candidate C, unless Candidate B finishes second in both, then Candidate D will definitely win it all. It really does serve us well to know that Candidate E has a strong team working for them in South Carolina and that Candidate F is way behind in terms of fund raising. It is equally important to know that Candidate G is slipping in the polls because they announced their candidacy too late or they haven't yet connected with voters.

All this is so much better than spending time on issues - issues beyond just Iraq and health care. Specifics are lame. Concrete plans to solve complex problems put me to sleep. Politics in America should ultimately be about who has the best, most nuanced talking points. It's the only way voter's will see change, something that, luckily, every candidate happens to be offering.

7 comments:

Amy said...

I think I'll just stick with Candidate X.

Hot Lemon said...

Dude, I'm so damned worried about Brittney that I just can't FOCUS on shit like this...

Skylers Dad said...

Nope. Sorry Chris, the sarcasm meter is reading zero. Nothing here to see people, move along, move along.

Writeprocrastinator said...

I tell the Missus all the time that Lincoln wouldn't stand a snowball's chance in these times. He wouldn't be telegenic enough and I imagine his "Q-rating" would be in the negative numbers.

FDR wouldn't get to be President, either. It's not what is in your heart, it's all how you lie and how good you look doing it.

Distributorcap said...

chris --

do you actually want us to be an informed nation that cares?

then what job would Tim, Chris, Georgie, Cokie, and Ann Coulter have?

my favorite part is when Matthews has an orgasm when one of his boys (Rudy) gains a whole point in the polls....

and then he has 547 more useless pundits to analyze the one point gain

but health care
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

'Bubbles' said...

Let's see, it was 1964 when my dad realized that the press was just looking for a story to make themselves popular - true or not. They almost ruined his life, and my family moved to Brazil so that he (and we) could have a 'normal' life. The internet is the only thing left to save us from the press, me thinks. While they continue to do what they have always done, hopefully they will be outwitted by the brave, the smart, and the well versed who find a voice and audience via the internet. I sure as hell hope so.

vikkitikkitavi said...

I fucking love it, too! Come on! If a poll asking people how they feel about news isn't news, then I don't know what is!