5/20/2009

We Have A Toaster!?...

I don't spend a lot of time in our kitchen. The other day, Megan, who knows our kitchen intimately, asked if I'd like her to make me some toast with cinnamon & sugar on it.

"We have a toaster!?" I asked.

"Um, yeah," she replied, incredulously.

"Get the fuck out of here!"

"We do."

"No, seriously, get the fuck out of here. I am so fucking pissed right now. I can't believe we had a toaster and you didn't tell me."

"It's been on the counter the entire time."

So yesterday I went on a toasting spree. I toasted bread, socks, utility bills -- you name it. The thing is awesome! Then I discovered this drawer in the kitchen that had forks and knives and shit in it. No kidding! I cannot express how much easier it is to eat certain things now. Before you ask, yes, we do have a refrigerator. I knew that one already. That's the cold thing you put beer and frozen pizzas in. It's tall and white. At least I think that's it. I may be confusing it with the oven.

14 comments:

Megan said...

What's also funny is that you didn't know how to make cinnamon toast. And by "funny" I mean 99% exasperating and maybe 1% amusing.

SkylersDad said...

Megan, you should introduce Chris to that porcelain object in the bathroom called a toilet. He will go crazy over that!

dguzman said...

Pull yer head out, Guy!

Mnmom said...

Just remind me never to give you the nuclear codes!

Scope said...

Man, when you discover toaster ovens, your brain will 'splode.

kirby said...

I make cinnamon toast in the broiler. If Megan uses the toaster, how does she keep the sugar and cinnamon from sliding off the bread? I'd experiment with this myself, but I don't want to set my toaster on fire.

Megan said...

I attach it with unspeakable amounts of melted butter brushed onto the toast right after it pops out of the toaster.

I'd also like to point out that I never even had a toaster before moving in with Chris, so the toaster was actually here before I was and it STILL came as a surprise to him, despite the fact that he must have purchased it at some point.

Scope said...

She probably hid it under one of those toaster cozys. They're like appliance camo.

raf said...

Bless you poor thing!

Red said...

It is possible, Megan, that he never purchased it. I once lived with a guy friend of mine in NYC. I was his seventh and final roommate in that apartment. When we were splitting up the kitchen stuff, there were things that didn't belong to either of us. He tried to argue that since they weren't mine they should be his, but I won a nice Pyrex(TM)bowl and some measuring cups and spoons by reminding him that he doesn't cook.

In my current apartment, I've now lived here longer than anyone else and there are a few things that have been here longer than I have. I'm totally taking the gold rimmed juice glass when I move out.

GETkristiLOVE said...

Just make sure you keep your buns in the toaster, not the oven.

Distributorcap said...

i knew my avatar would come in handy one day

laurie said...

you have an oven??

~E said...

Just don't ever wander around the backyard. You may find you have a grilling apparatus back there and when you do...god help us all!