4/21/2008

Yellow Jackets Be Warned...

There aren't many things I hate. I reserve my hatred for the most vile things in our world. One of these is the yellow jacket. I did THIS POST a while back on the subject.

They have been congregating around my deck the last couple summers, annoying me and my guests with their hideous presence. I just want them all to know I will have no mercy for them this year. I am prepared to use whatever means necessary to eradicate every single fucking yellow jacket that crosses my path, even if it is nowhere near my house. I will track them down and kill them, their families, and their friends. And don't anyone give me any crap about how they're a vital part of the ecosystem and they pollinate things and blah blah blah. NO! Fuck that! The other, nicer insects will pick up whatever slack their absence causes.

These motherfuckers have messed with the wrong guy. It's open season on you bastards. Enjoy what's left of your wretched lives, because your days are numbered.

7 comments:

Falwless said...

Once again I am in love with your post tag. "Cocksucker insects" is gorgeous.

Joe said...

When do your yellow jackests show up? Ours don't usually appear until late in the summer, so you've got plenty of time to prepare.

I want details, please

bubbles said...

Thing 3 would agree with you whole-heartedly.

I feel this way about scorpions.

Cheer34 said...

You are a tough guy....if I were a yellow jacket i would be looking for the quickest ride off this planet.....

Writeprocrastinator said...

"And don't anyone give me any crap about how they're a vital part of the ecosystem and they pollinate things and blah blah blah."

But they are, picnics and barbecues couldn't be ruined without them.

Amy said...

Since I'm a single girl now, I need someone to come kill them for me. Would you like the job? My kids won't help me, they don't like my girly screams.

SkylersDad said...

I have an image in my mind of you dressed like Carl in Caddy Shack, making yellow jackets out of plastic explosives.